Wednesday 19 August 2009

No baby steps

What's that point between absolute exhaustion and nervousness? So much so, you know you're craving some much needed bedtime, but you can't fall asleep? Is there a word for it? Because that's where I am at the moment.

I'm sitting on my empty bed, in my empty bedroom, with two stuffed suitcases and a carry-on bag that I pray will make it past the check-in counter. The car will be here at sunrise to drop me off at the airport.

I wasn't going to blog tonight, simply because I'm not sure where my thoughts are.

On one hand I can't wait to begin this new adventure. I'm excited for all that I've yet to learn, observe and take part in. I want to add to who I am, in the hopes that I'll become a better person down the road. I am going into this experience with an open heart and mind, knowing that whatever comes my way will enhance my character and help define my place on this earth.

Then, the other part of my brain kicks in, and I find myself shaking with fear. No, not the fear that's crippling (I'm well past crippling), but the kind that makes me second guess myself, and tends to over think and over anticipate. None of which I want to do.

I'm hoping the part that's willing to go with the flow and embrace all events and happenings will somehow overthrow the nerves.

I'm looking forward to sleeping on the plane.

To all of you who've shared your thoughts, comments and wishes with me over the past few weeks, THANK YOU! Your support has meant the world, and your actions and words will forever remain in my heart.

Here's to the next chapter... I can't believe I'm actually doing this!

xo
SC

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