I'm OK. You're OK.

I'm overwhelmed.

I spent Saturday doing some of the shopping for my big move. I'm not quite certain why, but my nerves are rattled. Sometimes, in a quiet moment, I'll find myself thinking about what it is I'm doing... and soon enough I realize that I've freaked myself out.

The mind is a bizarre place, isn't it? I spent a good enough period thinking about making this decision, and now that I have, I'm thinking about all the reasons I shouldn't have done it.

I wish I didn't have time to think, just for that reason.

On a car ride through the city a few months ago, my friend noticed that I spend a great amount of time staring out the window. She likened me to another friend of hers who drifts off in thought sporadically.

Anyway.

The news seems to be digesting strangely across the board. Some of my friends are pretty thrilled about the opportunity, as they are well-traveled and know of how much one learns and grows when on their own.

Others say they wished I was given an offer good enough to let me stay in Toronto. I suppose in an ideal situation that may have been best... but that's life, right?

I met up with one girlfriend last week. She said she was excited about this opportunity, but admitted she was sad she wouldn't be able to have random dates with me any more. I shared her sentiments. We spent the evening along Toronto's harbourfront, taking in a free movie playing in the outdoor theatre by the water... truly, such a fun experience. It made me miss the city already. But the next day another friend reminded me that Toronto will always be here for me, so I have nothing to worry about.

I was grateful. Because I won't forget the city... but I fear sometimes that the city might forget me.

xo

SC

Photo courtesy of Zazzle