Festive Baking

We're almost at mid-December, and I'm starting to get into the festive spirit. I've always enjoyed baking, and I think the Christmas season begs for some relaxing time spent in the kitchen. Yes, I said 'kitchen' and 'relaxing' in the same sentence!

Nothing brings me more joy over the holidays than setting aside time to listen to carols, while baking festive treats for friends and family. How comforting is the smell of freshly baked shortbread? What about ginger molasses cookies? These smells send me into a state of nostalgia —the good kind! The kind where every one of my senses gets engulfed in happy memories.

So I thought I'd take this opportunity to share some of my favourite recipes with you. These aren't family secrets (I'll save those for another post... maybe!), but they're a blend of tried and trues, and ones I'd like to attempt over the holidays this year.

Classic shortbread cookies, all dolled up for the holidays. Shortbread cookies are my standard go-to when it comes to baking. Easy, delicious, and SO much fun to decorate.

I get especially excited over Christmas time because Hershey's brings out their Candy Cane Kisses. These beauties are chocolate peppermint cookies with Candy Cane Kisses. A delicious blend of some of my favourite things!

One of my best recipes for family and friends is this delicious chocolate chip cheesecake, with an Oreo cookie crust. It took me a few tries to get it right, but now it's a recipe I turn to at almost any celebration.

My friend Melissa baked these fantastic vanilla bean cupcakes, with strawberry buttercream during a get together this past weekend. She found the recipe online. The cupcakes are delicious by themselves, but the buttercream is unbelievable. She took fresh strawberries and mixed them in a food processor, then added them to the buttercream. The result? Buttercream that tastes more like strawberries than sugar. Delicious!

Love 'em or leave 'em, no Christmas bake-a-thon is complete without a classic rum fruitcake. My mother has a great recipe that she turns to every year. She even soaks the fruit slices in rum, months ahead. The smell of the cake baking in the oven sends me into nostalgic overdrive.

So what are your festive baking plans for Christmas? Do you have your own tried and true recipes you turn to? Or perhaps you're attempting something new this year? Do you have any secret recipes passed down through the generations? I'd love to hear from you.

Whatever you find yourself doing in preparation for Christmas, I hope you have fun! I hope you're surrounded by love and laughter, and that your experiences give way to wonderful memories you'll cherish and turn to in the years to in the years to come.

xoxo

Images courtesy of Pinterest.com and Google Images

A travel destination where I love the people

30 Day Travel Challenge
Day 7 - A travel destination where I love the people

You're probably learning quickly through these posts that I haven't travelled to that many countries around the globe. As much as I'd love to say I've visited numerous exotic locations and written about the strangest customs in the furthest of places, the truth of the matter is, I've really only been to a handful of countries. But I'm OK with that. For now anyway. This exercise is forcing me to look back on where I've been, and really focus on what I took away from each of my travels.

So...  from my experiences so far, I'd have to say I loved the people I met in Seoul, Korea. The people I'm talking about are a handful of expats -- not originally from Korea. In fact, they're kind of from all over the place (The U.K., South Africa, USA). But I'll always associate my happiest experiences in Korea with them. They're kindred spirits, and fellow wandering souls. They get me and I get them. And it took me leaving the comforts and familiarity of my life in Toronto to finally experience people with a shared wavelength and understanding of life.

I say I love the people in Seoul, because some of them are still there. They went back to their native countries for a while, and then chose to go back to Korea for another round of work.

These are some of my soul mates. I know that they'll always be a phone call, e-mail or Skype chat away. And I also know that I'll be seeing them again, someday soon. I really do love them! And I'll always be grateful to Seoul for bringing me a group of kindred spirits from around the planet, without having to go in search of them.

Check out:

10 things I miss about Seoul, Korea

The world in my shoebox

FIFA, Football and Family

Image courtesy of Google Images

Resilience

I spent some much needed quality time with a couple of my girlfriends this past Saturday. Is there anything better for the soul than easy laughter over brunch with forever friends?

We don't see each other a lot these days, so when we do get together, it's always well appreciated. The conversations focused around the usual topics -- what we'd been up to since we last got together, men, our families, men, women, our upcoming plans, men... and reminders.

F decided to get tattooed on Saturday. She had been mulling over the idea and placement of it for a long time, but after finally having made up her mind on the 'where' and 'what' she decided the 'when' had to be on Saturday. So after a day of shopping and gossiping, we found ourselves on Yonge Street, in the friendliest Tattoo parlour I'd ever been in.

F told me a while back that she wanted the word "Resilience" tattooed in script on her body.

"Why not 'Resilient'?" I asked. "Wouldn't that be better?"

"Well, I'm not resilient. It's something I have to remind myself to try and be everyday," she said.

And after having listened to some stories from F's life, I couldn't think of a more perfect word for her to meditate on.

Resilience.

Ten letters joined together to connote so many different visuals and ideas.

Life expects us to be resilient, but no living thing can fully say they are, can they? Resilience is something we have to strive for. Plants and animals have to strive for resilience against the elements. And if they survive, they become resilient -- but just through that particular storm. If another one comes along, they have to strive for resilience again... and again... and again.

It's the same way with humans too -- we have to strive for resilience through the elements and physical forces. But there's also resilience from emotional and mental pitfalls. Battles that were fought long ago can leave unseen scars which, for some people, need to be dealt with everyday. These scars can affect our everyday life, our choices, our paths. But striving for resilience helps us get through, whether it's one day at a time, or one hour at a time.

If we simply turn on the news these days, we're reminded of what a mess our world is in. The recession is destroying families and businesses, earthquakes and tsunamis are causing havoc, and man-made wars are hurting civilians in so many countries.

And in between all the headlines we read "...but the people of Japan are resilient. They will get through this." Or "Libya is one of the most resilient nations in the world." Or even "This recession has made people resilient..."

The thing is... they're not. They're striving for resilience. They're fighting battles they didn't ask to be in. They've been dealt these cards and now they're trying to cope. They're trying to be resilient.

Resilience isn't something that comes with the click of a button... it's something we have to hope for. It's something we have to strive for.

Resilience is fueled by the hope that we can get through. That someday, everything will be OK.

xo

Image courtesy of Google Images

Gimme a break!

I'm heading up to Montreal for a few days to visit one of the besties. I'm really looking forward to the min-break from Toronto. As much as I love this city, it's starting to make me restless. I haven't left it in five months. I never imagined five months as being a long time, but it is. Things I like about it are starting to annoy me right now. I think it has more to do with my state of mind at the moment, rather than the characteristics itself.

Sometimes stepping away helps bring an image into focus and perspective. And that's what I'm hoping will happen during my time away. Since moving back to Toronto, I've been on this hectic train ride trying to keep up with a life I imagined. I've been trying to chase down something that's felt pretty out of reach so far. And it's time to recharge the battery.

One of my favourite spots in Old Montreal - the Notre Dame Basilica. The architecture is so magnificent and haunting, all the same. I go here every time I visit the city.

I've been to Montreal a handful of times in the past, (both, in the winter and summer months), and I absolutely adore the city and its pulse. There's not a lot I want to see and do there, but I've always appreciated the shift in pace that comes with stepping into a new space. Truly, for all I know, I'll be vegging on my friend's couch, lost in glasses of red wine and stories of a far less complicated life. And that sounds perfectly delightful to me.

My life will be waiting for me when I get back. Just like it was waiting for me when I got back at the end of August. If there's one thing I learned in the months since I've been back, it's that everything you take a break from from will always be waiting for you upon your return. And sometimes it will magnify. The best thing to do is just... deal with it in any way you know how. Even if it doesn't make sense half the time.

So I'll deal with you, dear Toronto life. I'll get back and deal with you next week.

xo

Image courtesy of Google Images

Fragments of December

Today has been quite the day. Seems as though the doom and gloom of this recession is finally setting in. I feel like it's seeping into my being, taking over thoughts and moods that were otherwise quite optimistic and upbeat. Who would have thunk it, right? But please bear with me.

Note: I'm also openly accepting thoughts of optimism and positivity. So if you've got anything Deepak Chopra-worthy in you, please send it my way!

First off, I received a lot of feedback from the previous post about my experiences with the TTC. This led to Brad Ross (Director of Communications at the TTC) contacting me via Twitter about the entire incident. I'm glad he messaged me, and his understanding with the whole mess was absolutely appreciated.
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A recent conversation with my friend B revealed that she's hoping to move back to South Korea sometime in early 2011. The reason being that she's finding it difficult to secure a job in her hometown of York in the U.K. I absolutely understand how she's feeling (because it's pretty much the same situation in Canada), and I truly hope it works out for her. B is a wonderful person and she has a lovely wandering spirit, so I think traveling some more will be good for her soul. Cheers, dear friend!
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I also woke up to some devastating news today that a childhood friend of mine passed away in a sudden car accident last night. It was such an awful feeling once the news sunk in. What's worse is that thanks to social media, he's still somehow present and active online. As in, his profiles are still active -- although on Facebook, it's now turned in to an online memorial of sorts. It's all rather bizarre... though, I suppose it's also a testament to our time. These are definitely strange and new feelings to process.

It really got me thinking about 'last moments'. We don't know what our last moments on this planet will entail, really. Freak accidents happen all the time, and all it takes are mere seconds for our entire universe -- every bit of foundation that we've built our entire lives upon -- to shift and crumble into the abyss.

May your soul rest in peace, dear friend.
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Finally, I'm hoping something will give in 2011.

I'm currently taking this course titled, "Patience 101" at the School of Life, and it seems like there's a pop-quiz every day. Some days I do better, and some days result in epic failures.

I'd like to experience a win of some sorts in early 2011.

Yes, that would actually be quite lovely.

xo

Giving Thanks in 2010

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! I hope you're all set to have a special weekend with your nearest and dearest. May you always be wrapped in joy and surrounded with love!

I have a lot to be thankful for this year. After a whirlwind adventure, I'm blessed to be home, safe and sound, with those I care about most deeply. I thank my lucky stars every day for friends who keep me grounded, and for those who challenge me to colour outside the box! I'm giving thanks to those of you who remain faithful, even when I tend to run low on steam.

"Just keep swimming...."

All the best, my dear family, friends and readers! May the warmth of the season always find you all with smiles on your faces!

xo

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Image courtesy of Google Images

FIFA, Football and Family

While most of my friends in Canada grew up with hockey and baseball as the family sport of choice, I was programmed to enjoy football (or soccer, for those in North America).

Yes football... the kicking, dodging, dancing, fancy footwork and general culture surrounding the sport, are things that I absolutely enjoy and look forward to.

Though most Goan families will admit that their children were born with a bias for the sport, I feel like my story was a special case. I didn't start off enjoying it. In fact, as a child, I would stir up an absolute ruckus while my father, brother, mum and uncles would sit around the TV and cheer for their favourite teams.

It wasn't until I was a little older that I started to develop a true appreciation for the game. My father used to play for Air India football club, and I remember listening to his stories as a child. I used to be in awe of this book he had, with all the newspaper cut-outs that carried his name and pictures in it. He even had a little showcase at home dedicated to all his trophies and medals. It really was a sight to see... and boy, did people SEE when they came to visit.

But, I digress. The point is that I started to enjoy the sport when I noticed how well and easily it brought people together. My family would literally stop any work, bickering and chores, just to gather around and watch 90 (and overtime) minutes of soccer. Regardless of the games' outcome, I remember this energy that would always fill the room -- it was contagious. Food and drinks were plentiful... and there was always enough mango juice or lemonade for my brother and me (this was very important). Soon enough, I joined my family and neighbours to indulge in the sport.

When we moved to Canada, I realized how much I missed this sense of belonging and comfort that came along with the sport's culture. I suppose I was more fascinated with that, rather than the game itself.

Canada has this same energy with hockey. However, because Toronto is such a vibrant and multicultural community, there's always an option to visit one of the specific 'country villages' to join in cheering for particular teams.

This is the first year I won't be with my family for the FIFA World Cup. It may not seem like such a big deal in general, but to me, it is. I'll miss the silly arguments with my brother (who ALWAYS roots for the underdog, just to spite me), and the friendly bets with my mum (who, somehow, always ends up winning... even though she begins by supporting the team that ends up losing. You tell me how this works!)

However, the beauty of being away from home this year, specifically, is that one of my dear friends in Korea is from South Africa. She's been spreading the joy of the game - which is being hosted in South Africa this month - for as long as I can remember! C has her outfits ready, the game schedules, and has even set up events where all of us can watch the matches together! This is bliss, with my United Nations family!

I'm really looking forward to the next couple of weeks. I even went out and bought a red Korean soccer jersey to support the Korean Red Devils. It's interesting living in a country again where the game is actually appreciated nationwide.

I'll leave you with "Waka Waka" by Shakira - the official song for the 2010 FIFA World Cup. Watch it, listen to it and love it! The beautiful video will have you moving in seconds!

xo
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P.S. Be sure to visit One Moment, One Note (a project by SFTC) for some insightful, inspiring and funny moments from people around the world.

"Waka, Waka!"

Full speed ahead

A few weeks ago it dawned on me that my time in this country is limited. And as soon as that happened, the weather picked up, with days of sunshine and brightness gracing us for all the adventures that laid in store.

The past couple of weeks have been filled with trips to amusement parks, neighbouring cities, traditional markets and coffee shop terraces.

May 1st was spent at Lotte World for my friend J's surprise birthday party. Lotte World is the equivalent of Canada's Wonderland in terms of amusement parks, with the exception of fancier decor and an indoor park to compliment the lavish outdoor playground. Seven friends and I spent the day being kids, while indulging in all the fair food we could get our hands on. We paid for it by feeling ill in the days that followed, but for the time spent in laughter and giddiness, it was absolutely worth it.

The main castle at Lotte World amusement park in Seoul. Has a definite Cinderella feel to it.

May 5th was Children's Day in Korea. It was a national holiday, so all schools were closed, including banks and some government buildings. Three friends and I decided to take a day trip to Incheon to check out the country's biggest Chinatown, while eventually winding up at the ferry docks, where we indulged in a few carnival rides.

Chopstick sets at a traditional Chinese store in Incheon's Chinatown.

The close to perfect weather has been bringing us out of hiding a lot more these days. It's starting to make up for the endless months we spent indoors, avoiding the bitter, winter cold, and then, the brutal yellow dust that followed with spring.

A shot of the fairgrounds at the Incheon ferry docks.

It's been nice seeing people less tense than they were in the previous months. There's a sense of lightness in the air, along with more opportunities to explore the country I've been living in for the past eight months.

A large number of the friends I've made here will be heading back to their own countries in August. I can't imagine what it will be like saying goodbye to people who've become like my family while living in this country. In fact, I can easily say that some of them are my family. Yet, I find it comforting to see beauty in these circumstances, knowing that I now have a global network of friends who I'm sure I'll be seeing quite often - in different parts of the planet.

They say everything in life happens for a reason... and if that's true, then coming to Korea was a wonderful idea, if the reason was to meet kindred spirits such as them!

xo
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Calendar Days

Well, April's almost here. It seems like just yesterday that I'd been preparing for my move to Korea. I have been in this country for just over seven months, with only five more left in my contract. I'm amazed at how quickly time has gone by.

Saying that a lot has happened over these past seven months would be a grand understatement. It's all that and so much more. I've grown in more ways than I knew possible, learning from experiences I never thought I'd have. And looking back on all the positivity and negativity, I can only say that I'm grateful.

Most people don't have the chance to do this in their entire lifetime. My friend here tells me the story about her grandmother, who lived in China till she was 80. After never having been on a plane or to another country for all those years, she ended up moving to America to be with her family... having to adjust, at that age, to a whole new life in a whole new world.

I've been lucky.

I've met some amazing people on this journey, so far. These are friends that I truly believe were brought together by fate and chance. They come from all walks of life, from different parts of the world. And yet, we all exist, here, as a family. We take care of one another.

When people ask me what life is like as a teacher in Korea, I can't really be honest with them. The only people who truly understand what a parallel universe this is, are the ones who've experienced it themselves. Sometimes I find myself sharing stories with friends back in Canada, and they usually respond in disbelief. "Not possible!" or "That didn't really happen... did it?" are the most common reactions.

Chances are, I'm telling the truth. That it did happen... and I've probably only given you the rough sketch of the story!

OK, and I'll admit that not all of these experiences have been brilliantly positive. More than once I've found myself in situations that I wish I could erase... but I guess life doesn't work that way. All I can do is learn and grow from them.

So, here's to the next five months. Here's to Spring flowers and Summer adventures. Here's hoping that time doesn't move so quickly that I'm blind-sided when August hits... but not so slowly that I sit here staring at the clock. I want to savor all of everything as it happens. This is a special chapter for the memory book, and I want to look back on it fondly someday and say, "Yeah, that really happened!"

xo
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The world in my shoebox

Multicultural: adj.
1. Of relating to, or including several cultures.
2. Of or relating to a social or educational theory that encourages interest in many cultures within a society rather than in only a mainstream culture.

Having lived in Seoul for just over five months now, I think it's time I shared a little bit about the relationships I've formed here.

I always imagined that moving to a different part of the world would expose me to new cultures, ideas and people, and that I'd eventually make new friends. What I never expected, was to move to a new country, only to connect with people from all ends of the planet.

My journey in Seoul began with a fabulous perk -- a mandatory orientation where 100+ teachers from across the globe had to coexist in a dorm-style facility for just over nine days. When in a situation like that, one is bound to form connections and create relationships based on common interests, goals and backgrounds. You're sort of given instant friends. And that's precisely what happened.

Five months into my stay, I can truly say I've been blessed in that respect. The epiphany hit me a few weeks ago when a few of us gathered at my shoe box for some wine and chit-chat. I had stepped out of the room for a bit, and when I came back in, I couldn't help but pause and look around. There, in my little, dressed-up, Manolo shoe box, sat friends representing various countries such as China, South Africa, Iraq, Columbia, USA, Canada and Korea. We also have a representative from the United Kingdom from time to time, but she was away learning Korean on this particular evening.

I couldn't help but smile.

This is the essence of travel -- stepping out into the wide world and realizing that there's more to life than the status quo. It's about understanding that connections can be formed with people, regardless of language barriers, skin colours or geography.

Dear Readers, I truly wish you could listen in on some of the conversations that take place among us. They're filled with rich stories of culture and days long gone. We talk about values, traditions and our colourful families. One of us even told a story about her grandmother's 'witch' cousin, back home! True story!

All in all, I wouldn't trade any of this for the status quo, because the joy and absolute laughter that bubbles out of my little shoe box on 'wine and chit-chat' nights, is something that I'd like to bottle up and treasure for the rest of my life.

These are some of the simple pleasures that come when traveling with an open mind and an open heart.


xo
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Image courtesy of Google Images

Global comfort gestures

I've been anticipating writing this post for a while now. The reason for the delay is because I was waiting for a package to arrive from my mum in Toronto. But this afternoon, when I got home from school, I saw not only the cute package sitting at my doorstep, but also a card... from someone else.

These past few days have been filled with beautiful gestures and wonderful surprises that have truly left me grinning like a fool... but a fool, with a full heart.

I was feeling a bit down over Christmas because, with the exception of my family, I hadn't heard from a few close friends back home. I didn't think it would be a problem for me, but I realize now, that it makes a difference when you're away from home over the holidays. Little gestures go a long way. It's one of the lessons I've learned this Christmas.

I started my winter hours at school on Monday this week. What do they involve? Well, seeing as how this is the break before the new school year starts in March, there's no students at school, except for the ones who are taking extra or special classes. I was supposed to have a 'winter camp' but it was cancelled due to a lack of interest from the students at my school. My co-teacher compensated by creating a class for me to teach twice a week, two hours each time, from this week till the end of January... to a grand total of five students. Today was supposed to be my first class... a grand total of zero students showed up.

The result? I get to sit and 'desk warm' at the coldest desk at school for half days, every day, from now until the end of January.

It could be worse. Rest assured, SFTC will be seeing a lot more action in the coming days, as I plan my escape to sunnier skies, somewhere tropical. Stay tuned!

So, yesterday, I wasn't looking forward to coming in to school. It was the first day back after the Christmas break, and after overdosing on 'happy', I dreaded having to sit, mute, in a cold staffroom.

Until I got to my desk to see a card and a Canada Post package waiting for me. Two friends, one from Toronto, and the other, from the Canadian NWT, had thought of me before the holidays and send treats in the post!

The card was from the same friend who sent me the stack of magazines earlier in the semester, when her father was visiting Korea. The card is now proudly displayed at my desk, right in between the caricature drawing of me, done by a student, and my timetable.

The package was from a dear friend I made while in journalism school. She, having traveled through Asia for many years, said she knew the difference a package from home would make. I was told to expect a card from her... but not a package! So, you can imagine my surprise when I opened the Canada Post package to find some lovely treats - a chocolate Santa (with ingredients listed in English AND French), some soap, a non-tacky, non-Koreanized reporter's notebook, and a magnet with the Canada 2010 Winter Olympics logo on it (now proudly displayed on my fridge at home).

I can't begin to express how I felt, sitting at my desk, in the cold hours of the morning. Despite the chaos with my schedule, I felt such a warmth fill my heart as I read and reread the cards over and over.

Thank you, friends!

Then, this afternoon, after I stopped off to pick up some soup from the restaurant across the street, I came home to find the package from my mum and the card (from a friend who I've met exactly ONE time in my life).

The package from mum contained neatly packed items that I'd asked for... including eye-drops that I desperately needed to battle the dry Seoul winter. My brother argued and said I could easily find it here, but it's a matter of comfort and principle. The stuff I used in Toronto worked well, so why switch?

The card was an unexpected and absolute heart-warming surprise. It's the first time during my time here, that I've actually taken a step back and thought about everyone I know at home. About the people I've met along the way.

In the card, this friend mentioned that it's very rare when you meet someone and have an absolute, instant connection. I couldn't agree more. And when it happens, you truly have to treasure it. Despite our single meeting, I feel as though I've known this person for a much longer time... and for that, I consider myself blessed. Thank you, dear Clubdir (not seals)!

So the lesson from this is that no matter how far away you gravitate from home, sometimes, it helps to have home come to you (whether in the form of packages, long e-mails or cards in the post), because it reminds you of... well, you! All it takes sometimes, is the comfort of familiar handwriting or an inside joke to quell even the saddest of thoughts.

Because it's very easy to forget you, sometimes, when you're off trying to discover other parts of yourself. When home comes to you, it helps you remember that you aren't really alone. That even through the silence and chaos, home is always with you.

So thanks, dear friends and family! You've managed to warm my heart this winter's day. And I couldn't be more blessed.

Stay tuned for the New Year's special.

xoxo

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Image courtesy of Google Images

Merry Christmas, 2009

Dear readers,

I hope you're all enjoying a blessed holiday with the ones who love and care about you. May you all have peace, joy and happiness in your hearts, along with plenty of laughter. I'm going to be spending the day with a few friends in Seoul, at a small potluck lunner. My contribution? Chicken with paprika and parsley, tossed in a pan. It's simple and easy enough to make on my one hotplate... and it's delicious too!

As I head out the door, here's a little throwback for you all to enjoy... it's a song I overdose on, every Christmas. I hope you enjoy it as well!

MERRY CHRISTMAS

All my love,

xo
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Will Write For Chocolate

A quick note after receiving my first care package while in Seoul.

One of my friends back in Toronto had the bright idea to purchase a bunch of magazines and send them to me as a package. I realize she knows me better than I thought she did, because I was going through some major reading withdrawal. This is just what I needed! These magazines will keep me entertained for weeks. I am thrilled.

Aside from issues of People, Cosmopolitan and Elle (sure to satisfy my need for trashy reads), she also included a December '09 copy of The Writer, a magazine I used to browse through while strolling around Chapters or Indigo. One of the first things I saw while flipping through it at my desk, was a comic strip I had completely forgotten about.

Will Write for Chocolate is a pretty entertaining cartoon published on the web by Toronto-based Debbie Ridpath Ohi. It chronicles the life of a writer trying to make it through her first novel. I've found myself chuckling to these little bursts of entertainment many times, because on so many levels, I can relate.

Here's one that's my absolute favourite.

Lesson learned for today: Never underestimate the power a well thought out care package can have on your emotions... especially during a chilly, mind-numbing winter's day!

Love you lots, HC!

xo
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p.s. You can click on the picture to make it bigger.

Image courtesy of WillWriteForChocolate.com

Seoul Writing Dates

I've met a kindred spirit, here, in Seoul. She's from Chicago and I'm from Toronto... we had to get ourselves across the world, to meet in a city where we're both equally confused and amused all the same.

This is Sharon on our first coffee/writing date at Holly's Café in Seoul. She never fails to represent Chi-Town wherever she goes. Lest we forget.

Sharon's company has resulted in many ab workouts for me and all those who surround her. Truly, she's a 'what you see is what you get' kind of woman, and if you don't like it, she'd only be too happy to show you the door. I like that about her. I never have to second guess her thought-process. In a country where a lot of people flutter around with hidden agendas, Sharon is a refreshing gem.

Even as we sit her today, on writing date #2, she's managed to make me laugh with some random bursts of questionable grammar and misspelled words. Oh, did I mention she's also a journalist? Amazing times!

Check out her blog... Sharon in Seoul.

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I'm inching at the two-month mark, here in SoKorea. It's quieter moments like this where I truly start to reflect on my journey so far. To say it's been a shock to the system would be an understatement. I've had to deal with situations and experiences that I never imagined having the strength to put up with. But somehow I have... and I feel I'm better off because of that. Yesterday, a friend of mine said he thought this would be a life-altering experience for me. I think it already has been.

Last weekend I had to experience my first holiday alone - Canadian Thanksgiving. It was the first time I felt pangs of homesickness. I wished I was home celebrating with my family, and simply lounging on the balcony chairs, watching the maple leaves flutter to the ground. Simple pleasures that make life beautiful.

Fortunately, I've met wonderful friends here, who made sure I wasn't alone on a single day throughout the weekend. I spent my time indulging in some amazing Korean food, watching a free concert at City Hall, meeting Sharon for the start of many writing dates, and ... lesson planning. No complains. I'm loving all my experiences here so far... yes, even the confusing and mind-numbing ones.

This Saturday, I will be joining some of the other teachers for a much needed retreat at a Buddhist temple, for 24 hours. I'll certainly write about it and share my experiences with all of you, once I get back.

Till then, lots of love and hugs!

xo
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As I gazed into my eyes...

"You should try being selfish!" she said, with the most serious face she could muster. "It's fun!"

I couldn't help but laugh. I knew she meant every word of her ridiculous statement, but it was the way she said it. Recently she had been on this tirade to get me to do things for myself -- without considering even one other person. 

"You know what? You don't give people enough credit!" she said, thoughtfully. "You have this weird idea in your head that if you disconnect yourself for some much needed TLC, everyone will just... I don't know... fall apart or something." 

OK, so maaaaybe I thought that. Maybe just a little bit. But she didn't have to be so Judge Judy about it. Sheesh. 

"I'm just used to life this way," I said. 

"And what way is that?"

"Just the way it is, you know? I mean, of course I want to do all the fun stuff, but who doesn't?" 

I wished she would just give it a rest. But ever since she realized I was pretty much done school, she had made it her mission to evoke the ME gene in, well, me. She was convinced we all had it. Some people embraced it earlier on and never looked back, while others required some coaxing. 

But she never fathomed that having it was a bad thing. In fact, she thought quite the opposite. To her, being able to go through life while loving yourself unconditionally and putting yourself first 95 per cent of the time, was the key to happiness. And she was determined to get me at least 50 per cent of the way there. 

"I am selfish," I said. "I do things for myself all the time!" 

I could feel the wheels spinning in my head as I prepared to answer the next question that I knew would come. 

"Like what?"

Bingo!

"Lot of stuff!"

"Like what?" she repeated.

"Like... taking that vacation after undergrad."

There, that had to throw the scent off.

"Could you afford that vacation?" she asked.

"Yes."

"Did you make the decision to go, on your own?"

"No."

"Not selfish!" she said, with a look that started to irritate me. 

"Oh."

"I'm talking selfish like... looking at yourself in the mirror and seeing only you... selfish," she said. 

"I do see only me. Do you see two of you when you look in the mirror?" I asked. 

"Sometimes... but the good one usually loses."

Ha!

"OK, here's a prescription for you," she said, with seriousness. "You need to go home and make a list of 5 things you want to do in the next two months. They don't have to be be big or extravagant things... just easy stuff... and then? Just. Do. it."

"What's the catch?" (always a cynic!)

"Just you."

"I'm the catch?"

"Yes." 

"Oh, and one more thing," she added, as a side note.

"Do yourself a favour, and stop thinking."

xo

SC

The Bonus

"I guess I'm just wondering when it will be my turn," she said, as we strolled through Little Italy. "It's just this awful feeling... and it's worse these days."

I understood how she felt, but I knew from similar conversations I'd had with others, that sharing my understanding with her was probably the last thing she needed at the moment. 

So I listened, while making a mental list of all the emotions we were sharing at that exact time and place... I wasn't in unfamiliar territory with this conversation - it was one I'd had with myself many times before (and probably will, sometime again). 

"I just think that each time it's going to be different," she thought out loud. "Each time, I hope I get that special... something. You know?"

I knew. And she knew I got what she was talking about. 

We made it to our destination - a cute little lounge in the heart of Toronto's Little Italy, where a couple of our other friends had already reserved a table for us. We spent the night catching up - a bunch of young women chatting about the things that young women chat about. Well, except for one thing. 

One of our friends had made the difficult decision not too long ago to pack all her bags and move across the world, into a different hemisphere, to be with a man she'd met a year ago while backpacking through Europe. If this move wasn't a true test of the heart, I didn't know what was. I commended her and wished her nothing but the absolute best and all the love in the world, as she embarked on this adventure. I silently wished I was also that gutsy. But then I also realized there wasn't anyone I needed to move across the world to be with, so the wish thankfully dissolved quickly. 

----

I came home a bit pensive. I couldn't help but keep going back to the conversation I'd had with my friend earlier that night. I saw the sadness in her eyes, and on some level, I wondered if mine reflected the same. I used to dwell on the "when is it going to be my turn" idea. But I realized that it wasn't helping me in any case (and besides, I've never been good at line-ups). 

So I came up with a thought process, and tonight, I propose it to you, my friend:

Maybe the 'turn' is a bonus. 

We enter this world as one and we leave as one. We don't get to take anything with us once we move on to the next volume. So, then, can't we argue that we should spend our lives trying to do the things that make us happy -- as one? Whether it's crafts (or glass blowing), going to concerts, reading books, going on travels, meeting people, whatever... shouldn't we ultimately spend our time on this earth figuring out what makes us smile all on our own?

Once that happens, we can look at anything else that comes along and gives us the same feeling as a bonus. And this includes that 'turn' we had talked about. It's just this icing on the.... life-cake (sorry, strange analogy, I know... but it's a good visual, no?)

If we could somehow find ways enjoy our lives with things that give us butterflies all on our very own, we'd perhaps be happy. 

And anything else... love... winning the lottery... world peace... whatever -- well, those could just be bonuses. And if, by some chance, those things never came along... then we wouldn't leave this earth feeling as though we'd lost or missed out... because we'd still have life-cake... just without the icing (and sometimes icing is overrated, anyway).

... Just some thoughts for tonight.

xo

SC

P.s.: And for the record, I don't believe by any shot, that you will leave this earth without your icing! In fact, your difficulty might be deciding what kind of icing you want! ;) xo xo xo 

I find it funny...

... that as a writer, I barely ever have time to write for leisure.

I've had a lot on my mind lately. Some of it is school related, while other things stem from the personal aspect that I referred to in the post previous to this. Some experiences over the past few months have left me thinking and longing to reevaluate a few areas in my life.

For one thing, I am trying to appreciate where I am in time and place. I want to keep remembering that life is about the journey, not the destination. I've realized that it's so easy to get caught up in where I want to get to, that I tend to forget where I am. I keep telling myself that there's certain things that are out of my control and that there's only so much I can do without losing it. And this is a fact. I'm realizing quickly that I can't be in control of all the outcomes in my life (as much as I'd like to). It really does seem as though some things are just predetermined, and we just have to play along. This is because no matter how hard we fight for something, sometimes, it's just not destined to be ours.

I've also been talking to a very good friend of mine lately, about some experiences she's been having in the guy department. Though I tend to be an idealist, I must acknowledge that I haven't been too optimistic lately. But I thought, without a doubt, that what she shared with this guy was something special... and I guess I was wrong.

Sometimes even Peter Pan masquerades as a grown man, though he is fully aware that he wants to stay a boy forever. To this friend, please remember, you're worthy of a man who loves you just the way you are, no questions asked and no mind games required. You don't need Peter Pan, and you certainly don't deserve to be second to anyone else. I hope you always remember that. Also, I've shared this with you already, but just in case... no one can make you feel inferior without your consent...

Finally, I'd like to ask some (small few) people in my life who tend to call themselves my friends (you know who you are), please--without doing me any favours--please give me a little more credit than you do. I think I deserve that much.

four more weeks.

xo
SC

This Magic Moment

A recent chat with a friend helped oil the squeaky wheel that doesn't cease to stop turning in my head.

We were talking about living life in moments... rather than by the events and milestones that we anticipate. By this, I'm referring to the obvious.... births, birthdays, graduations, firsts (kiss, dance, job, child, etc..), and so forth.

Instead, we discussed the joy and beauty that stems from the simple moments that remain understated. They can slide into our lives spontaneously -- a walk through a park or a drive through the countryside. Or perhaps the moment can be captured even when we're doing nothing at all -- the peace that comes from sitting on your front porch with a book, or while having a chat with someone you really enjoy.

I remember thinking that if we lived our lives from one happy moment to the next (not thinking in terms of grandiose things... those are just the anchors to this cake that we call "life"), then everyone would perhaps be more content.

I mean, don't get me wrong... I know that all moments aren't happy... there's deaths, illnesses, accidents, poverty, world hunger and a thousand and one people just waiting to see you fall down and crush your own dreams...

... but really though... we learn from those experiences and we take away from them. They drive us and (should) make us into better human beings.

So, in honour of that conversation, I took some measures.

Last week I went through my closet and cleaned it out (throwing away clothes isn't something i do easily). I emptied out about a third of it. It felt symbolic. In my mind I figured that if I couldn't get rid of things I was holding on to because they meant something at a certain point and time, then there was no way I'd be able to move on and live from one moment to the next.

Now my goal is to try and live by moments.

Whether a smile creeps up to my mouth when I sit outside and smell the last of the summer rains... or whether my mind captures a moment where I'm sitting down for dinner (for probably the 100th time) with the same friends I've had for years...

I want to bask in those moments and enjoy them for what they are: the points in my life that will eventually link together and define who I am. And as I look back, I probably won't remember with clarity about how mundane the activity or moment may have been... but I will remember how I felt while I lived it. That will be the best and most important part.

xo
SC

Shake your hips...

It's your Birthday!!!

Happy Birthday, Marzipan!!! I hope this year will be an amazing one for you.

Just remember these few pieces of "notes" I've picked up from some wise therapists:

* It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser

* The first rule of holes: stop digging if you're already in one

* As your memory gets shorter, expect your complaining to get longer

* You will find that your patience is getting better... but you then realize that you just don't give a crap about crap anymore

* Finally, remember that growing older is a matter of mind over matter. Provided you don't mind... it doesn't really matter!

Luv ya!

xo
SC

Define 'Blog-worthy'?

This was a Facebook message exchanged between myself and a couple of friends who've been galavanting around Europe for the past three months...

SC says:
Dear N & V,
I hate your status updates. Please stop... I've been crying for 3 months now. Luv you and hope you're having a great time. ♥ SC

N's response back:
SC!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love you and i miss you andf i cant wait to see you
you are the greatest pers0on ever

ive been drinking
so my tpyoing is horrinble
i applogise
qahahaha
SC
2 weels
we need to catch up
i love you



..... Definitely Blog-worthy!

xo
SC